Most of us have experienced some form of bullying at some point in our lives. May it be from our peers, our parents, or a person in authority, we know how it feels to be degraded and humiliated with the feeling that we are nothing, that we are insignificant. As we grow up, we learned to cope with bullying in our own way, reasoning out, sometimes even fighting back. But what if it is someone we know or we love that is being bullied? How can we help them to go through this difficult time? What can we say or do to make them feel better? Here are a few ways to help those that we love in dealing with bullying.

What is Bullying?

There is bullying when a person is humiliated and picked upon in a repeated manner by an individual or group because of either his appearance or social standing. There are three kinds of bullying: physical bullying, where a person is deliberately hurt by others through hitting, kicking, pushing, taking of belongings or any other way that causes physical harm; verbal bullying, where a person is hurt by the use of words such as throwing insults, calling of names, or making any deliberate comment calculated to be offensive against another person, either delivered in front of many or through mobile phones, email or letters; and indirect bullying where a person is deliberately alienated and excluded from a group or by spreading rumors against a person. Bullying is harmful because it makes a person live in constant fear and it also causes health and social problems. Studies have reported that people who have been bullied are more prone to having mental problems such as anxiety, stress, low self-esteem or depression. We know that bullying is detrimental to a person, but what can we do?

What to Do

If your child is being bullied, the best thing to do is to talk and listen to your child. Tell them that you are there to help and that you love them. Talk to the school authorities about it as soon as possible. Try to help your child cope by encouraging them to write about their feelings or to draw about them. The important thing is to coordinate with the school and work with them to eradicate the bullying problem. If your child is being physically bullied and it seems to be escalating, you may want to inform the police about it, especially if you are dealing with a teenager.

If you are the victim of bullying and you are worried that it may lead to physical harm, try to avoid being alone or going home alone. Be with your friends or people that you trust especially when you are being bullied. The best way to stop the bully is to ignore them and just walk away with your head high. This tells them that you do not want a confrontation and that you don’t care but at the same time it also says that you are not afraid. Even when you are being taunted to fight, don’t. Don’t ever use physical violence as this only makes matters worst. Manage your anger by expressing yourself through writing or exercise. Be confident about yourself, even when you don’t feel like it. Think of what you can do best and don’t let the bullies control you or define who you are. Be sociable and try to find true friends that can help you go through your problem. Finally, look for someone you can talk to and share what you are feeling. May it be a parent, a sibling, a friend, a counselor or a psychiatrist, venting your feelings can help you work through them.